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Monday, March 30, 2009

Cycle ya Stand::::True for Everyone...


"You may have heard the story of the young Army officer 40 yrs ago when he got a cycle loan and purchased one from the unit canteen.
The cycle was a beauty (the way mobikes/cars are today) but did not have a carrier at the back. So he sent his orderly to get one fixed.
When the cycle came back with the carrier fitted the Y.O. noted that the stand was missing.
He went to the CSD authorised cycle dealer and asked him why the stand had been removed.
He was told: "Sahib ji, Fauj me ek hi cheeze ho sakti hai- Career ya Stand.

Agar stand loge tho Career khatam
Aur
Agar career banana hai to stand kabhi mat lena."

Sunday, March 29, 2009

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid



This is weird, but interesting! This is a cool thing check it out.

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too...
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can....
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh?

ENLIGHTENED PERSPECTIVE



I've learned
.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned
.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned
.... That having a child f al l asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned
.... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned
.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned
.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned
.... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned
.... That sometimes
all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned
.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned
.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned
.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned
.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned
.... That it's those
small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.


I've learned... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned
.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I 've learned
.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned
.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned
.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned.... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned
.... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned
... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned
.... That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned
.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned
.... That I wish I could have told my Loved ones that I love them one more time before they passed away.

I've learned
.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned
.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

Rumours




Rumours
Rumours
Rumours

Check out>>>

http://www.snopes.com/


Saturday, March 21, 2009

Road Sense

Here Are The 15 Rules / Laws That India Lives By

1. The Other Side Law:
If my side of the road has a traffic jam, then I can start driving on the wrong side of the road.
2. The No Queue Rule:
If there is a queue of many people, no one will notice me sneaking into the front as long as I am looking the other way.
3. The Mind Over Matter Law:
If a red light is not working, four cars from different directions can easily pass through one another.
4. The Auto Axiom:
If I indicate which way I am going to turn my vehicle, it is an information security leak.
5. The In Spit Of Thing:
The more I lean out of my car or bus, and the harder I spit, the stronger the roads become.
6. The Cinema Hall Fact:
If I get a call on my mobile phone, the film automatically goes into pause mode.
7. The Brotherhood Law:
If I want to win an argument, I need only to repeatedly suggest that the other person has illicit relations with his sister.
8. The Baraat/ Marriage Right:
When I'm on the road to marriage, all the roads in the city belong to me. To ME..
9. The Heart Of Things:
If I open enough buttons on my shirt, the pretty girl at the bus stop can see through my hairy mal-deformed chest into the depths of my soul.
10. The Name Game:
It is very important for the driver behind me to memorize the nicknames of my children.
11. Parking Up The Wrong Tree:
When I double-park my car, the road automatically widens so that the traffic is not affected.
12. The Chill Bill Move:
When I park and block someone else's car I am giving him a chance to pause, relax, chill and take a few moments off from his rushed day.
13. The Ogling Stare:
If you don't ogle and drool at every hot Chic that passes by, you're gay.
14. The Bus Law:
If I stop my bus at the correct place near the bus stop, the city will explode and blow into 6 million pieces.
15. The VIP Rule:
There are only 3 important persons in this city -Me, I, Myself !

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Equations




Equation 1
Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore: Human = Donkey + Work + enjoy
Therefore: Human - enjoy = Donkey + Work
In other words,
A Human that doesn't know how to enjoy = Donkey that works.
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ ++ ++


Equation 2
Man = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore: Man = Donkey + earn money
Man - earn money = Donkey
In other words; Man who doesn't earn money = Donkey
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +



Equation 3
Woman= eat + sleep + spend
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore: Woman = Donkey + spend
Woman - spend = Donkey
In other words, Woman who doesn't spend = Donkey
++++++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +++++++++ +



To Conclude:
From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Man who doesn't earn money = Woman who doesn't spend

So Man earns money not to let woman become a donkey!

And a woman spends not to let the man become a donkey!

So, We have:
Man + Woman = Donkey + earn money + Donkey + Spend money

= Donkey + Donkey
= 2 Donkey
Therefore from postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude
Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!


Thursday, March 12, 2009

Jokes...No Pun Intended...



Man: Sir, my wife is missing.
Postman: Yeh post office hai, police station nahi.
Man: Kya karu? Kahan jau? Sala Khushi k maare kuchh samajh me nahi aa raha.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Husband: Tumse Shaadi Karke Mujhe Ek Bahut Bada Faayda Hua Hai.
Wife: Woh Kya?
Husband: Mujhe Mere Gunaaho ki Saza Jeete-Jee Hi Mil Gayi!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?
The mafia wants either your money or life... The wives want both!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

'The Widow Colony'

As the name suggests its about NewDelhi and rest Indian colonies wherethe anti--Sikh killings happened back in 1984. The film focuses on the incalculable loss of human life in the span of just three days. Despite all the evidence and eye witness testimonies justice has been denied to these victims for over two decades. Described by critics as the "most affecting" documentary to come out of India since Born into Brothels.
http://www.thewidowcolony.com/

"The Widow Colony - India's Unsettled Settlement", borrows its name from the settlement in Tilak Vihar, on the west-side of New Delhi, which is locally called the Widow Colony or Vidhva Colony.

>>>My only question >>> When will India Change for the better. If we cant take care of our own citizens, what else will we do?

A Violinist in the Metro

A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin. It was a cold January morning.

He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes.

During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousand of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.

Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace, stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule.

A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip: a woman threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk.

A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again.

Clearly he was late for work.

The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy.

His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist.

Finally the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk turning his head all the time.

This action was repeated by several other children.

All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.

In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while.

About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace.

He collected $32.

When he finished playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.


No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world.

He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written ; with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.

Two days before his playing in the subway, Joshua Bell sold out at a theatre in Boston and the average ticket was $100.

This is a real story.



Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people.

The outlines were: in a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour:

Do we perceive beauty?
Do we stop to appreciate it?
Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

One of the possible inferences from this experience could be:

If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?

Monday, March 9, 2009

Haven't heard a good pun in a while?



Haven't heard a good pun in a while? Here we go>>>>
1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes inverse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!

DEV D...Emotional attyachaar



The movie is different. Can't call it entertainment but this is what i think>>
-It shows the true state of youth ...
-Emotional atyachar was the best part of the movie.
- on a serious note, i think the movie should be shown as a subject to parents and students alike so that can look into the future...
- the background score is good..right emotional song at the right moment..
- and the best of all..it mite be a minor turning point in bolloywood, as it explores female sexuality as it exists in India which no bolly movie has done till today ..except with flowers and bees..

Wolfram Alpha: Next major search breakthrough?

Wolfram Alpha: Next major search breakthrough?

In May, Wolfram will unveil his latest creation, now called Wolfram Alpha. It applies his work with Mathematica and NKS (A New Kind of Science) to Web search.

It follows the Google principle, with a simple input box, but takes a different approach to rendering search results. Nova Spivack, CEO of Radar Networks, which developed Twine, an ambitious "interest network" Web application based on semantic Web technologies, said that Wolfram Alpha may be as "important for the Web (and the world) as Google, but for a different purpose."

Read More>>>
http://news.cnet.com/8301-13953_3-10191304-80.html